I went to one of the most beautiful beaches here this morning. Quiet, not in the big city, actually- in the town I was born in. Not many people out at 9am on a workday.
The water was cool/warm, and walking through it looking at shells and out at the surf I got to thinking about--well, everything.
Things like how lucky I am that even though I work so so hard to be working and singing all of the time, the way that this career works is that I DO get breaks and this time to visit my family and have a vacation.
Even though I worry about where and when I'll work next and I am constantly self-promoting, thinking about contacts I need to keep in touch with, new contacts I can make, whom I can notify about this or that, upcoming, auditions, etc, and even though I'd rather be the most busy person, even too busy- taking on projects right and left, having this time, even if it was just a week (turns out it's almost three this year), is really important.
And not many people with "regular" jobs get to have that. So sure, I'll take my starving artist lifestyle with its ups downs, fear of lack of stability, success that relies not only on talent but also on the knowledge of the business and how to break into it and stay there, and everything that comes with it over a nine to five.
If I get to have mornings like I did today. Where I thought about family, love, life, happiness, kids, and yes, even music, scores I need to learn, what to listen to next on my ipod, how crazy it is to be apart from people and things that you love and still find connections to them in the smallest ways- like seeing a shirt you'd buy for him that you just know he'd love, or seeing a couple floating off in the waves farther away than anyone else in the water--alone in togetherness.