30 June, 2006

weekend update

Audition for two v.i.p.s in the young artist/future big named opera house scouting business went well. The conductor of the opera was there as well, so I think overall I impressed three people, one of whom rememberd me from a previous audition, and the other who asked for my birthdate "for my records"---I guess so next time they hear me they can compare with now? Or maybe just to see if indeed I'll be the youngest person employed as said opera house in the past x number of years...yea, right.

Then the recital. Oh, the recital. Here is the part that I don't really know about. Of course everyone comes up to you and says what a great job, bla bla bla. I felt good about two sets. I mean, really good, vocally and emotionally. The Russian I maybe had the emotion but have sung better. The French- sang well, maybe needed a bit more emotion. The Italian. Those D's on open E or A vowels. Here is my question..if I'm "used" to getting a comment from my old teacher about intonation issues on those D's and C's, did I do it this time? As I've said before, I can't hear it. I can think higher, approach from maybe a trill above kind of position. I WANT someone to say something. I could ask. But sometimes right after a concert that seems like you just want MORE praise and attention, because who is going to tell you right after you've sung that one note was consistantly under?

It didn't SEEM like anyone was making up their comments and praise about the performance. The singers were all genuine, and the coaches even had their specific favorites. The heads of the program were all smiley and everything...I mean of course one little pitch in one or two songs isn't a big deal, but I'd still want to know. And I'm not sure how to go about it. Maybe in a private coaching if I get one after all of the operas are on their feet.

In other news, the internet is now here. I don't know if it's our network, or stolen. But even with all of this time to now actually get these cover letters, thank you letters, career stuff drafted, I'm completely exhausted. I mean- vocally fried, physically TIRED (and of course still can't fall asleep or wake up easily), and emotionally--feeling distant from friends, family, one person in particular- and only really connecting with 26-30 other people here on a daily basis.
That's not to say that it is at all shallow conversation or shop talk. I of course hope to continue these relationships, but I also can't find the words or start to write the emails to just stay in touch with everyone else.

Maybe it's just fatigue. If I continue to crash this server, I'll eventually get around to emailing everyone hello.

There is a big looming business of singing email/letter that I have to compose and get out there in the next month about that big grant, and I just can't do the work right now.

Not to mention personal notes of thanks to future family for gifts, etc. oy.

I feel like I'm in more of a bubble here than in school. Because I don't even know where the post office is, I have no TIME to find out, and the only thing I know is that 20 minutes away a super Wal-Mart has all of the answers to life's little questions.


26 June, 2006

here part three- and vocal fatigue

Today I'm feeling it.
Well, yesterday too- even though it was the day off---damn me for talking and dancing and staying up until 3:30am on Saturday night.
All of yesterday I felt like I didn't want to talk...and then what happened? Well, we met our "opera parents" --people who adopt us, let us sit in their nice houses with nice AC, feed us, let us do our laundry for free for the summer, and supply us with other homely goods throughout the season.
Well, that used up two more hours of schmoozing. Even though I went to sleep pretty early, and my schedule was kind of light today, I still feel completely sung out.
I've had musical theater coachings to search for good keys to sing in, coupled with recital coachings, and of course run-throughs. Even though it's not that much singing today I experienced the moment of complete muscling...meaning, I was no longer singing correctly because it wasn't comfortable, and then my jaw and neck decided to do the work for me, and then it was all strained and crappy for about 5 seconds. Then I relaxed.

This was kind of the feeling that I have written about regarding nerves and performance...that two second thing where you feel like you're freaking out and your larynx is up at the top of your mouth and in your nose and you're basically just screaming and at the same time ripping your vocal cords out.
Well, it's not as bad as that stage experience. But it did begin. No.

There are other circumstances like being bitten by something weird on my upper BUTT, and not drinking enough water --I know this because...I know. But venomous spiders and mild dehydration won't stop me! I must get better by supposed bigwig auditions, my recital, and the full run-through on Thursday, and just good in general.



22 June, 2006

here part two

Day---I already don't know what day it is during the week. All I know is that every evening there is a new schedule to jot down for the next day, music to learn, choreography to memorize, and business to be busy with.
I'm having a lot of fun in everything. This group of people has a really nice flavor, and I'm enjoying mainstage rehearsals as well as little studio artist coachings, recital preparations, and of course the big musical theater show to prepare for! That will be exciting- the first time belting legitimately in a while--well, if the directors let me!

More news when WIRELESS is more convenient.


19 June, 2006

Here part one

The scoop so far:
People- Really fun, nice- even in this small group you can tell that we will all get along.
Music- Sang through first show today, felt good about my general feedback, waiting for something more during staging or coaching.
Place- well, it's HOT. There is no AC- almost anywhere, but that's usually ok with me. The one thing I still haven't gotten used to is the room/bed, and therefore I have not slept well for the past two nights. Also, there is some sort of something that I'm obviously allergic to because everytime I walk into my room my nose gets stuffy and I feel like cryyaap.
Looking forward t0- what I refer to as "Death by Aria"- tomorrow night, where everyone sings their prettiest. It should be fun, and will set a more relaxed pace for us to get through the summer once we all have our pats on the back and such from colleagues and the bosses.

Update two coming when internet is wireless in the dorms.


15 June, 2006

Ball 'o Stress

Please let me go back to the beach for 4 hours a day and make me a hummus filled pita!!!
I've been packing/loading new songs onto the ipod/updating resume and bio/choosing music and clothes to take for the summer for the past day and a half.

My back hurts again, and I have been in my PJ's all day! I only went outside to put my suitcases in the car!!!!

Tomorrow at 10am begins the car journey with a stopover in good ole' University-land for one more coaching, depositing bank checks, tying up loose ends since I won't be back through there until the end of the summer, and seeing friends for dinner.

This will be fun once I get unpacked.


14 June, 2006

Sweet Apple Presents

Well, I'm back laden with Duty-Free shopping bags filled with wonderful goodies and gifts that I will pass on to deserving friends and family. My bags made it even though I packed one suitcase inside the other (mildly suspicious) and checked it through Kennedy to Boston. I made it, managing to tear myself away from the tv/video monitor of the plane's progress over the atlantic in the seat in front of me long enough to sleep through two meals and all refreshment offerings on the 11 hour flight, and still not get a huge dehydration headache.

What I've heard so far:
"Wow, you look so rested, relaxed." "You look great" "You look different- like you had a great time and you're in your own skin". OK then!!! Vacation forever! Put me back on that plane!

No, really, I do feel rejuvinated. Of course also sad to leave my family and the place I called home for so long in my youth. I'm excited for this Saturday and the next 10 weeks to begin a new musical adventure, but also am absolutely NOT able to pack bags, figure out what music to take...pretty much I'm in denial that I am supposed to be on my way in my car tomorrow toward my musical summer destination.

BUT there are some things that are of course taking up my packing time...among them my NEW IPOD VIDEO 60 GB!!!! OH YEA!
I already transferred 17 gigs of music onto it, and that was just from my OLD ipod!! I haven't even gotten to ANY opera or any of my CD's that I still listen to in my car from time to time!

11 June, 2006

but oh, those summer naaHiiiiights

Last full day of "vaycay". Tomorrow at 1am I'll be on a 13 hour flight back to NY and then on a 2 hour flight back to Boston to pick up my car and drive out to begin my summer program.
What will I do today?
What I do everyday Pinky...

Wake up late (check, it's 10:30).

Lounge around and pretend to listen to the chorus music that I still have to memorize.

Eat the best food in the world (unless you're dehydrated for two days without your knowledge and can't figure out why you DON"T want to stuff your face full of Hummus and Pita).

Visit my family one last time because who knows when I'll have around a grand to drop on this kind of flight again.

Go to the beach.

Buy friends some stuff that says my friend was on vacation and this is what I got(still haven't decided whether this will take place at Duty Free or in the city).

Not waste time on the internet even though I really want to get back in touch with the real world in the day leading up to my return to it.


01 June, 2006

where have all the bloggers gone?

Just took a look through my links and through links on Counterpoint's website and realized that one is no longer alive, one is closed to friends only on livejournal, and people aren't really actively posting in general.
Is it because summer is here and the weather is nice?
Is it because someone found out who you were?
Is it because you can't deal with people's comments on your blog?
You don't have enough energy to keep entertaining?
The summer "YAP" season has arrived and you have a lot of music to learn?
The summer "YAP" season has arrived and you have NO music to learn?
It's easier to blog when getting rejection letters every other day between the months of December and February?
You're buckling down and getting those roles in preparation and you don't want to divulge how spectacular you'll be next year?

Well, it's not like I'm obsessed with reading other blogs, it was just nice to be able to check in and see what other people were feeling, thinking, doing about the fact that they want to make a career out of the same thing that I want to make a career out of. (AHH- I know I shouldn't end sentences with prepositions, but I really couldn't figure out a way to make that one work).


when it rains...

I suppose that statement is used most often with "bad news", so maybe I should have entitled this "good things come in...".

1. Notification of a very very very exciting honor through email.
2. Another gig! (through phone message retrieval from another continent...and email).


No jinxing.

I couldn't even sleep last night I was so excited. I turned on my non-internationally-capable phone and scrolled through the address book to see who I could call in the US, since it was only 7pm there...but really, that people that it matters to already know how much I thank them, look up to them, continue to seek out their wealth of information musically and dramatically.