25 April, 2006

personal life

Any advice for members of the long distance club?
This is not about frustration in any physical way, but frustration in a sense that I know I want to spend my life with a person who at this point lives over 5 hours away from me by car, next year (because of my career move) will live over 5 hour flight away from me, next next year may live in a different country then me (because of his career move), and on and on. His location is not viable for my career. My locations are not viable for his career. When can meet in a decently large city that is 2 hours away from where he currently works, but there is still no sight of an end to the long long long distance. Marriage? Yes, we say we want it. Will it happen when it's "convenient"? And when will that be? And even AFTER that, what city could we POSSIBLY live in if neither of us is able to work in the other person's city?
It's not about giving something up. I would absolutely move there and see if I could "commute" the 6 hours to NY, or the 2 hours to Boston, but how feasible is that? I'd be away JUST as much for gigs, lessons, auditions! I may as well move to NYC and see him on weekends or whenever else possible.
Frustration at it's peak.

We love each other, but we are just beginning the careers that we want to have for the rest of our lives. There is no fighting about it, because it's not an issue. We do not ask nor will ask the other to ever give up anything having to do with career. We are both too strong and smart and supportive and happy about the life/career that the other person has chosen to ask them to give it up.

This is the crappiest "rock and hard place"/ Scyllia and Charbdis (Greek mythology anyone?!).
Because it's a non-discussion. We can say I miss you every night. And I wish I were there. And When will we be together. And I love you. And I can't wait until we are married. And we will be so happy together.
And I don't see a year that that can happen. Well, at least I see the next two as years that it can't happen in because of actual location.
I usually don't complain about these things because it's just a given, but tonight it was particularly hard.



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