worst travel weekend ever

...and I have had 4 flights scheduled.
The first one (Wed night) was on time, lovely, and the flight attendant even sang for us (yes, it was on Southwest).
The second one (Today) was HORRIBLE. United at O'Hare. Supposed to leave first at 4, then delayed until 5:15, 6:30, 7:45, 8:45 and finally we get a plane at 10:30, and then they take off the "delay time" indefinitely because there is not a FULL CREW to take me back home!
WHAT?!!!
Meanwhile there are THREE flight attendants who are just..flying..that flight..meaning, they're off duty or something, or they worked their max. hours...and they can't do anything.

Then I'm on the plane sitting next to a lady who must have just eaten some sort of meat sandwich because that's all I smelled for the entire flight, and behind me are three kids who think it's awesome to grab the top of my seat (inadvertantly pulling my hair) and then slam their playing cards on the tray table (rendering me unable to sleep at all).
There's a baby one aisle away whose mom is letting her climb all over the seats (inappropriate-the flight is full. sit your kid down- we don't need to have drool dripping from her mouth to the front of our chair), there's a guy who is separated from his fiancee and keeps asking his neighbor to get up so he can walk up 2 rows and make sure she's ok and talk to her, there's some other shrieking kids nearby (people--seriously. When I was a kid, if we made noise it was g'bye public place--restaurants, whatever..so we learned NOT to make noise and we were civilized children!!!)

So finally at 10:45 we get in the air. 2 hrs and a 1.5hr car ride later, I'm back and it's 3am almost.

Saturday I have to take a TRAIN for 3.5 hours into the city, then get on international flight number one, then get on international flight number two, before reaching my destination.

Hope it's not horrible.
ALSO- what is up with pilots somehow getting worse at decompressing the airpressure on the plane?
It seems like you're landing for 45 minutes! I mean, you ARE, but they can decompress better and my ears wouldn't be freaking with pain and not able to pop no matter how much I yawn or chew.

I think the thing I hated most what that I couldn't control any of it.
As soon as I arrived at 2 I really thought- ok, one delay. Next.
Then at 6 I started to think otherwise. But I had no computer. No way to see if any other airline was flying back here. No way to book a "for emergency" ticket on Southwest tomorrow morning (from the only acceptable airport in Chicago- MIDWAY!)...

So what is the lesson? Never leave my laptop at home even if I think it's too heavy to carry around with me in the city and schlep in my shoulder bag that really should be a backpack because I mess up my neck every time I carry things that are too heavy.

Basta.
Now I'm not even tired and it's 3am.